The reason most people don’t do things is because they are afraid that they may fail. We live in an environment where “failure is not tolerated” but we see that those who succeed usually do so by failing first. If you don’t try you won’t fail but you won’t succeed either. That’s why failure is the effective route to success.
Nearly all children are able to crawl without too much effort once they become strong enough, but walking, now that’s another matter. No child decides that they want to walk and then stands up and gets on with it. They fall over, often they hurt themselves and they will fail many times. Yet we don’t turn around and say to them “well it’s obvious you can’t do it. Stick to what you are good at and crawl as well as you can. That way you won’t hurt yourself and you certainly won’t fail.”
The example above seems silly and obvious but why is it that as we get older, we find failure more and more unacceptable. Those that succeed have failed, sometimes many times before they experience success. Unfortunately, not all those who fail succeed but 100% who don’t try have really failed. They have failed to try things that are available to them which may or may not bring huge success either in their business or private lives. They have certainly failed to experience the wonderful opportunities that are out there.
In his book Energize, Simon Ong tells the story of Sara Blakely who was named by Forbes as the youngest self-made female billionaire after she founded her company Spanx when she was in her late twenties. She attributes much of her success to the fact that when she was young her father would ask her at the end of every week “what did you fail at this week?” If the answer was “nothing” he would look disappointed but if she could identify a failure, then she would get a high five. Not only was she still loved if she failed but she must have done something positive, and her understanding of failure was redefined. Failure was something on the way to achieving your goal or objective.
That’s why failure is the effective route to success.
Don’t get me wrong. Constant and ongoing failure for the wrong reasons is not to be encouraged. The best people know when to “cut and run” and accept failure but nobody has truly succeeded without experiencing failures along the way.
What will you do this week to move you forward? If you fail – remember to give yourself a high five (or whatever is your preferred expression of delight) but most of all, be concerned if you get to the end of the week or month without any failures. No failure, no advancement.
Many of you will know that I am training to be a helicopter pilot. It’s a long and often frustrating process. Yesterday, after failing more times than I can recall I managed to hover successfully, under control in a cross wind. The sense of achievement was massive, and I was on a huge high for the rest of the day. This was only the case because I had failed so many times. If I could do it right first time then there would be no sense of achievement, no feeling of success. You can only have success when there is a risk of failure, the higher the risk of failure, the sweeter the success.
Do you want to crawl or walk? Effective people walk but fall over many times along the way.
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